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 Bloodtalon's Original Story

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Bloodtalon
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PostSubject: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 26th 2014, 11:11 pm

This is story is what ignited the flame of my character Bloodtalon. This sit e changed him a lot, and I'd like to share what originally happened. I will NOT take requests on the story, because this was already made, I am just reciting it. Enjoy :3 (Clans: Shadow, River, Wind, Thunder)
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 26th 2014, 11:24 pm

Can't wait to see. :3

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 26th 2014, 11:35 pm

Prologue

Lilystripe snuck through the reeds, ready to abandon her Clan. She was dreading swimming across the river surrounding camp, for her belly was swollen with four kits that were against both the warrior code and the medicine cat code.

Yes, she had four kits that belonged to a ShadowClan deputy known as Darktail. She had fallen for his tricks on the brink of leaf-fall, when she was searchingnfor horsetail. He had found the herbs for her and given them to her, oh-so kind, even in the influence of his brutal Clan. She had trusted him with her life.

Now, she was abandoning her mentor, Vinewhisker, to become a rogue. But before she left, she had made sure of a few rules before she left for wherever she wanted her children to be born. First off, she would keep her name in sake of her heritage. Second, she would teach her offspring to hunt and fight and teach them the warrior code. And finallky, never tell them about their father.


In a few moons, Lilystripe had kitted, with four kits by her side. They were now only two moons old, but happy and energetic. She loved all of them. She had named them without clan names, but it was for the sake of her secret. A plain silver she-cat named Spirit, a black tom named Crow, a white tom named Blood, which Darktail had recommended when she trusted him, and Weather, a sikver and gray she-cat.

Her kits were weening and she was eager to catch them a rabbit to share. So she left them to sleep and in no time was out alone, catching prey. She had only caught a thrush, but it would feed them, none-the-less.

"I didn't know cowardly herb-pickers could hunt." A voice purred behind her and she barely hekd back a wail of dismay. This voice belonged to the tom who fathered her kits: Darktail.

She whipped around to face him, trembking so much that she dropped her fresh-kill. "Why...are you here?" She let out a long, slow, viscious hiss.

"I want to see my kits. I know you've birthed them." He demanded and started to walk past her. The den was visible to the both of them, but she refused to let him near them. She pushed him back.

"I see how it is." He snarled and slammed her to the ground. The kits inside that den heard a blood-curdling shriek. They all ran out, except Crow, the black tom, who hid in the corner.

Spirit came hurdling after the tom who had slashed her mother's belly,  but went flying over to the bleeding queen, dead. Blood and Weather saw this.

Weather yowled, common sense making her beckon him over so they could run and escape, but he nodded and told his sister that he'd follow shortly. He launched bravely at the tom but Darktail lashed out claws, not caring where he hit, just hearing a wail of agony.

Blood laid still, not wanting to shiw that he was breathing. Darktail grabbed Crow and bounded off, not saying another word.

Blood crawled weakly to his mother who was still bleeding out. Her breathing came in hisses, and desperate gasps for air as she spoke. "Listen..." She whispered to her crying, blinded son. "You must never forget the tom who did this to you. Don't hold grudges...but remember..don't cry..." She went limp.

Blood couldn't cry anymore. So he bolted off to find his sister.



"Hey, Dusktail!" A warrior called, looking at two bundles of fur hidden in a tree hollow. "There are kits here! This ones bleeding! G-get Irisfeather!"

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 26th 2014, 11:42 pm

Nice! :3

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Bloodtalon
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 26th 2014, 11:43 pm

Chapter 1


Bloodkit, newly named by the leader of ThunderClan, Blizzardstar, watched the other kits play. Lichenkit, Maplekit, and Weatherkit were playing moss-ball. Weatherkit offered to let him play, but Maplekkt was scared of him because of the scar on his face.

Mudkit was about Bloodkit's age but babied more just because his father was Dusktail, the deputy. Bloodkit was encouraged to become the kit's friend, but ever since Bloodkit's encounter with the murderer of his mother, he barely talked to anyone.

"C'mon, Bloodkit, why don't we just go outside?" Mudkit groaned, bored. He was irritating Bloodkit badly. Bloodkit narrowed his unswelled eye.

"Because you were told not to."

"Fine." Mudkit shuffled his paws for a minute before going to his nest and curlingnin a ball. Bloodkit sighed in relief as the kit's breathing became shallow and quiet and he fell asleep.

Bloodkit went asleep as well, drifting into horrible nightmares of murder. He was grown up, standing on a pile of Clan corpses, from elders to kits, cats he didnt know to even Weatherkit.

He woke up with a shriek and Blossompaw, an apprentice, daughter of Blizzardstar and Dawnleaf, was in the nursery in a split second. She was verh good at taking care of kits.

"Whats wrong?" She mewed, concern in voice.

"Just a bad dre-" He mumbled but was cut off as she picked him up for the medicine den. He didn't want to go to Irisfeather! Nothing was wrong with him!

"You need rest and Im sure you cant sleep." He was soon given poppyseeds and resting in the medicine cat den.


Last edited by Bloodtalon on September 28th 2014, 8:42 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 27th 2014, 12:03 am

Can't wait to see the rest. :D

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 27th 2014, 8:37 am

Awesome =D
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 28th 2014, 8:46 pm

Editted

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 28th 2014, 8:48 pm

Awesome. :3

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Bloodtalon
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 28th 2014, 8:51 pm

Thank ya

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   September 28th 2014, 8:55 pm

You're welcome! :D

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 6th 2014, 11:33 pm

Chapter 2

"You are now Maplepaw and Lichenpaw." Blizzardstar's voice boomed through the camp as he announced the new apprentices. Nightpaw, a rude apprentice, had been made a warrior.

He probably won't shut up long enough to have his vigil. Bloodkit thought. He sat in the nursery, watching. No new mits had been born, and no new friends had been made. His closest and only friend was his sister, Weatherkit.

He only felt pride in one thing: Value. He didn't think he was valuable untik he heard the Gathering News when the Clan came back that night before. Blossompaw described angry ShadowClan cats and nervous RiverClan warriors.

"WindClan was pretty normal, but found the RiverClan medicine cat on their territory! Lilystripe had been missing from RiverClan territory. Seems a rogue or a fox must've killed her. Darktail, ShadowClan deputy accused us of stealing ShadowClan kits! How foolish!" Blossompaw was one to talk.

It had hit him when she brought up stolen kits. His father was told to be ShadowClan deputy, therefore he and Weatherkit were so called the "stolen kits".

Blossompaw had continued. "They even declared war on us, the flea-brains! They said that they were planning a raid for if we didn't give up the kits!" She sounded very nervous at the thought of battle. Bloodkit wanted to be a great warrior, unlike this fidgeting apprentice.

Maplepaw trotted oved. "Hey, Bloodkit!"

Bloodkit looked at her and she flinched. He stifled a sigh. No one had gotten use to it. His eye. "Yeah, Maplepaw?" He mewed.


"I just learned the hunter's crouch! Wanna learn?" Bloodkit flicked his tail irritably. His mother had showed him, therefore he already knew. But she seemed excited, and maybe Clan cats had different methods...or at least RiverClan did.

"Sure." He mewed, fake enthusiasm dripping from his quiet mewl. He watched her ramble on and crouch down. She tucked her paws beneath her and kept her tail still and straight.

"You try, Bloodkit!" She mewed. At least she wasn't rude like her brother, Lichenpaw. He was more mature and more snappy than she. Weatherkit even shipped them (xD). But he never would want a mate. He wanted to make his mother proud of him. He wanted power.

He ablidged and crouched down differently. He shifted his weight to one side and on the other side reared back a paw. He seemed to lean forward, as if looking for something.

"That's no hunter's-" she stopped herself. "Thats a RiverClan crouch..."


Last edited by Bloodtalon on October 9th 2014, 7:22 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 6th 2014, 11:36 pm

Looks great so far. :3

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 8th 2014, 7:29 pm

Awesome
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Bloodtalon
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 9th 2014, 7:43 pm

Chapter 3

Bloodkit trotted confidently out of camp. He was five moons old now, and his bloodied eye was no more bloody, just scarred and blind. He found it frustrating to be half blind but at least he was alive, eh?

He stalked over to Lichenpaw, Blossompaw and Weatherkit, who were playing moss-ball. Lichenpaw said it was practice but everyone else there knew he just wanted to play a game like in the nursery.

"What's up, ya'll playing a kit game?" He said to fhe apprentices and his sister. Lichenpaw stepped forward, muzzle to muzzle with the kit half his size.

"We aren't kits, Bloodkit. You are." He snarled.

"You have kitten fluff behind your ear-" he was cut off by his sister, who was looking anxious in between the two. She looked at Lichenpaw and then her brother with both glares. Lichenpaw looked ready to throw the kit across camp- as if he could -and Bloodkit just shrugged nonchalantly.

"Hey, can Bloodkit join?" She just asked, cutting her brother's sharp retort off.

Lichenoaw stayed quiet and glanced sideways at the high-rock, where Blizzardstar stood for ceremonies and called out announcements. Shadefur and Twigleap, Lichenpaw and Maplepaw's mother, were chatting. The two she-cags didnt notice him pondering.

"I'll let you play if you're strong enough. I want you to act like the leader, Blizzardstar. Climb onto that rock and yowl as loud as you can. I dare you!" Lichenpaw murmured, voice low so no one heard his scheme.

Blossompaw and Maplepaw looked at him, shocked. Weatherkit stepped forward to protest, but Bloodkit was already climbing towards the top of the tall rock which seemed like a mountain to the matured kit.

Bloodkit got to the top, but as he readied himself to screech to the skies, his paw slid on ice that covered the stone. His beginning of a roar turned into a cry of horror as he slid off, two paws scrabbling for life on the slippery stone-pile.

Shadefur looked up, gasped and leapt up quickly. She grabbed him. "Ow!" He squeaked as the pressure made blood trickle from his scruff. At the sound of his squeak, she jerked and slid herself. Now she held a kit dangling in her jaws and she was in the position as Bloodkot had previously been in.

Now Twigleap was cautiously but speedily leaping up the rock, nimbke paws quick and steady. She crept to the edge. "Get the kit first!" She mumbked over a mouthful of kitten down. Twigleap grabbed Bloodkit and he steady got to his paws. Shadefur was scrabbling up.

But her old gray face morphed into a young white tom's with blue eyes. The ShadowClan deputy. Darktail was dying in front of him. Horror and hatred mixed in the kits eyes and he roared, slicing his tiny thorn-like claws across her paws. Shadefur shrieked and landed under the rock.

Crunch...

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 9th 2014, 7:47 pm

O-O Awesome
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 9th 2014, 7:59 pm

Awesome :3

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 10th 2014, 10:49 pm

Chapter 4

Screams were heard all around, young to old cats flooding away, and boy, was Shadefur a horrible sight to see. She was as crooked as a branch and she was convulsing as she vomited blood. She wasn't dead yet, but every cat hoped that she would be out of her misery soon.

That is, all but Irisfeather, the medicine cat. "Outta the way!" She yowled. "Outta me way!" She pushed past warriors and apprentices and stumbled ovsr kits until she got to the twisted warrior.

As Shadefur spasmed, Irisfeather slowly realized that nothing woukd save this cat. She had internal bleeding, a horribly broken spine, all paws were twisted, and one shoulder blade was fractured. She had a horrible wound, fore Nightfeather and Whitepelt, Maplepaw's father, had lifted Shadefur from a rock that had impaled her.

Weatherkit was crying out of terror, Maplepaw and Blossompaw were fidgetting from what they had just witness, and Lichenpaw had widened eyes and flattened ears, his eyes full of shock and guilt.

And then, there was Bloodkit standing on that rock, looking down upon that body. A rush of adrenaline coarsed through his small body and a jolt of ambition made his heart skip a beat. He had a vision.

He grew taller, and as he grew taller, that body of Shaadefur multiplied into his Clanmates until among them were kits and elders and betwen that from all Clans. They rotted into bones. He flinched and it was over.

He wanted power. No matter what it took, he would get it. Even if murder was nesscessary.
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 10th 2014, 10:54 pm

Poor Shadefur :c

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 10th 2014, 10:55 pm

Yeah...BUT IRISFEATHER :D

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 10th 2014, 10:56 pm

YEAH. IRISFEATHER! :D

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 11th 2014, 8:44 am

Awesome
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 11th 2014, 3:56 pm

Amazing!

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 You have been touched

"I will fight! I will! I will fight until my heart stops beating and my paws stop working! You look upon me and see just a tiny cat! But you do not see the fighting spirit! You know why I fight even when there is no hope?! Because my clan is my hope and I made a promise. A promise that I would protect everyone in nightclan, and I intend to keep it! The clan may not make a cat but the cats make a clan and we are Nightclan!"

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Bloodtalon
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Mood : hey guys guess what i'm inactive and also very boy i am boy i hope you know what i mean I AM BOY I WANT TO BE BOY I AM FTM
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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 11th 2014, 10:54 pm

Chapter 5

Shadefur had died later that day from her broken spine. The Clan had laid her in the clearing, unsuccessful at moving her to look as if she were sleeping. Her beautiful and brilliant eyes were dull and clouded. That was the only thing that helped them pull off her "nap".

If she were just asleep, she would be uncomfortable. She was splayed out on her side but her neck twisted the other way. Her tail was laying beside her chest, and she was just plain pitiful. And it was all Bloodkit's fault.

Nightfeather and Branchtail, two warriors, were murmuring amungst each other with Blizzardstar, casting glances at Bloodkit, who respectfully sat with the fallen warrior. Lichenpaw stalked over and sat beside Bloodkit.

Bloodkit was silent, as usual, but not in the same silence as usual. Lichenpaw noticed this. Bloodkit trembled slightly, and then let out a thin wail.

Lichenpaw put his tail to the kit's shoulder. "It was my fault, too."

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PostSubject: Re: Bloodtalon's Original Story   October 11th 2014, 11:10 pm

Aw :c

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